A Letter to Babysaurus.

Dear Babysaurus,

At 30 weeks pregnant, I can feel you move and wiggle at all hours of the day. It is the most joyous, exciting feeling. I think about what you look like in there--are you sucking on your hands? Are you being rocked to sleep when I move around? Are you a baby boy or a baby girl?

I'm so excited for October 27th. I think about you all the time (I'm sure you know that given that I talk to you incessantly throughout the day). Little chores and ordinary moments are made magical because I explain them to you and I'm so excited to show you when you get here. In the mornings I love explaining to you where Violet's dog food is and how many vitamins she gets with her breakfast. I can't wait until you can walk and you can feed her in the morning. I love getting the mail because I picture having you snuggled close when I walk down our driveway to the box. 

Your daddy and I went to a baby prep class last week and I realized how calm I feel about all the changes about to take place. Lots of people have asked if I am scared or nervous, but so far I am only anxious about meeting you--I want to see your little face and if you have curly hair and I want to rub that little baby belly. But when it comes to having our lives change, I'm too happy to be afraid. I wanted and waited and wished for you for so long. I know there will be turbulent moments and when the nurses hand you off to me to bring you home I'm sure there will be that panicked moment of "Oh gosh, I don't know what I'm doing!" But rest assured, I'm trying to learn as much as possible about how to keep you clean and feed you and make your brain grow and how to make your transition from my belly to my arms as easy for you as possible. I've been practicing swaddling and diapering on your stuffed animals. I've been planning little diaper and feeding and napping stations around the house. I've been making room for your bottles and blankets.

I try to make mental notes of all the things I want to do with you and show you. If you're born before Halloween I already have it on my mental calendar to watch Hocus Pocus with you. And even though you'll be teeny tiny still, I have lots of ideas to make your first Christmas really magical. I dance around to the Muppet songs and hope you'll love them as much as I do. I think about the first time you'll eat avocados and if you'll like them as much as I do (or if you'll hate them like Daddy does). I wonder how long it'll take Violet to get used to you and if we'll have to tell her to cool it with the kisses on your face (she loves a little too much sometimes). I think about your first giggle and first smile and first steps and first word (I think you should lean toward "Mama" but we have time to decide on that). 

Everyone in my life (our lives, actually) is crazy excited to meet you--I'm pretty sure your grandma is going to have to clear out grandpa's office to make room for all the toys and clothes she's bought you and grandpa is already planning the fun things you'll do together. Daddy felt you kick for the first time and is now a belly junkie, he constantly reaches over to see if you are wiggling or kicking (he thinks you're going to be a soccer player but by the way you move I am 99% positive that you are prepping for the hockey rink). Your aunties are already planning to spoil you and steal you away for sleep overs. One of your future BFFs (who is two and a half) has been asking what you look like and if she can hold you since you were the size of a walnut. Everyone is wondering if you are a boy or girl and what your name is.

Only a little over two months until I get to see your tiny fingers and kiss your baby cheeks and snuggle you close to me. It'll be the longest two months ever but feel free to take your time in there getting big and strong and (I'm sure) cuter every single day.

 

XOXO I love you most, 

Mommy